Malawi News 27.10.05

The past month has been a combination of day to day routine and some exciting (and not so exciting) challenges. As usual, the highlight of our time here is meeting Malawians, a number of whom could teach all of us how to find reasons to be thankful despite adverse circumstances. It is rare not to get a smile or a laugh from a Malawian.

The challenge of fluctuating water supply has fallen from the Number 1 slot in our list of challenges. At the time of writing this place has been filled by our gardener/ house boy, Arnold. I have a lot of time for Arnold. He works hard and shows initiative. He is willing to do whatever is asked of him and he is a very good cook. However, his private life is not quite so orderly. Arnold and his partner, Catherine, have now involved themselves in 2 incidents of domestic violence since we have been here, the most recent being Tuesday night. As Arnold was sporting a bleeding bite mark and Catherine was able to locate a large garden slasher with which she claimed Arnold was chasing her, we are quite concerned about this issue, not least because they have a young child who’s not even 2 years old. After a couple of attempts at mediation, things calmed down. Now, despite the fact that Catherine said she believed Arnold wanted to kill her, she no longer wants to leave and they are trying hard to convince us of their plans to live happily ever after.

It may clarify the picture to mention that the source of this argument was their impending wedding in December. Arnold had been to us a number of times, asking to borrow money so he could “do a bit of business” to make money for his wedding. We had told him as many times that we would be happy to help but not until he had a specific plan and could satisfy us that he would be able to pay the money back. Well, the business plans have apparently not advanced and, according to Arnold, Catherine was reviewing her options; specifically whether it would be possible to find herself a more wealthy husband. This is Arnold’s version of the story. Catherine’s version has not been so easy to decipher.

We are now faced with the choice of whether to evict them immediately because there is another family on the property who is affected by this violence or to give them another chance. I’m in favour of laying down some very clear boundaries and giving them another chance, but the big worry is that we will effectively be confining their fighting to behind closed doors. Clearly they won’t want us finding out about any further skirmishes because that will mean eviction. But what damage will be done, especially to their son, Owen, in the meantime?

Sadly domestic violence is rife in Malawi. Whilst officially it is not an accepted part of Malawian culture, women (and lets face it, the victims are usually women and children) who find themselves in violent situations usually don’t have too many alternatives. If they leave there is no guarantee that their family will make housing available because it’s their husband’s job to provide for them. Not always, but often, the husband is the sole income earner so the woman has no means of supporting herself and her family. Despite the fact that the law provides sanctions against such violence, the law is often not enforced here and how many women could afford to access the legal system?

So, we’ll give them another chance and hopefully will find a way of helping them access some education and counseling that will maybe help change things for them.

Dear God, didn’t I come here to have a break from family law?!

The rest of the top 5 challenges include:

2. Need and poverty everywhere around you. This is best represented by the many, many people who greet me when I’m out and about. “Hello Madam. Where are you going, Madam? Can I be your friend, Madam? Will you buy….?” There is literally no escape from people trying to sell us things. It’s my problem, I know, because it’s just one aspect of how life is in Malawi, but I wish there was one place I could go where I could find peace from the constant pressure to buy. Usually when I politely refuse to buy, the seller accepts that and goes on his (it is usually a man) way. However, there are times when the seller persists in the face of repeated, polite refusals. One seller persisted to the point where I found myself telling him, “In my culture it is rude to keep asking when I have told you I don’t want to buy.” But the greatest aspect of the challenge is not the “annoyance factor”, although that is a challenge. No, it’s the distressing fact that so many people in this country have so little and many are not able to eat every day DESPITE the amount of aid that is poured into this country.

3. Politics – it has been a long acknowledged fact that probably the greatest fundamental problem with Africa is its leadership. Sadly, Malawi is not leading the race to role model effective and visionary leadership! The headlines for the past few weeks have almost entirely centred on the efforts of a number of MPs to impeach the President. The basis of the charges are said to be the fact that the President came to power as the head of one political party and then promptly resigned from that party and created his own. Actually it seems that there are quite a number of men hungry for the position of President and in fact, that is their primary motivation for impeachment. I am not saying that the current President is above reproach but there may not be a better alternative right now. Also, it means weeks of Parliamentary bickering over the correct procedures for impeachment, whether the President should be found guilty, if so, who should be the interim leader etc etc. This all involves expense that the country cannot afford, not to mention the fact that nothing else is getting done and other more important issues (eg food shortages) are being overlooked.

4. Utilities - last Thursday night I was ordering take away (there are definite advantages to a high number of Indians living here) and the lights went out due to a power outage. Thankfully they were cooking with gas. If you can picture me sitting in a small restaurant with illumination from street lights and a couple of candles in the shop, waiting for my take away, and returning home to eat it by candle light, this will give you a picture of this particular challenge. I guess we’d have a power outage once per week or so and usually not for very long. It’s when you add it to the fluctuating water supply, the internet connection that drops out repeatedly and the phone line that on average once every 3 to 4 weeks just doesn’t work, it’s a challenge. Last night our phone was disconnected for non-payment of the bill……only we did pay the bill…..a week in advance……and the cheque cleared yesterday. The reason these things challenge us, though, is that we’re used to having uninterrupted supply of these services (well with the exception of my parents). We’ve used to having what we want when we want it. I think it’s actually good for us to have to adapt our lives to times when we don’t have these things.

5. The language – I’m progressing with my ability to speak and understand Chichewa, but they speak so fast! Actually, when I make the effort to speak even a small amount of Chichewa, I’m greeted with delight and enthusiasm. A little bit certainly goes a long way. It’s a great blessing that so many people speak English because otherwise it would be really tough but we do encounter people who don’t speak much English. Communication is then a challenge. Communicating by phone is also a challenge. We’re getting used to the African accent, but over the phone it can be nigh on impossible to understand what the other guy is saying. No doubt they say exactly the same about us.

These challenges can be frustrating, especially the politics, but in fact they help to make our time here all the more interesting and rich. Joy and happiness do not spring out of having all things under control or the way we like them, but out of being centred on the really important things in life.

On a slightly less esoteric note, Martin is in Blantyre to give a talk to members of the Electricity Company of Malawi and members of the World Bank on our project here. He received a phone call yesterday at 4pm to tell him that today was on! This is another example of the exciting challenges we’ve had this month. Providentially, he had prepared a power point presentation earlier that day because he also has to give a talk, this time to members of the Ministry of Finance, on Friday. He’s not sure whether he will cope with 2 days in a row in a suit!

We have a good social group of both expat and Malawian friends. I do my fabric painting classes each Friday morning and out of that group it looks as though a creative writing group will spawn. Once a month I meet with a group of ladies for a purely social dinner. We have done some small-scale entertaining and been entertained. Often work colleagues come to stay on their way through. Last week we had our housekeeper from Karonga down. She has a bookkeeping certificate and she was down so I could train her to do the accounts for Karonga. We belong to a local church which provides another social circle. There are a nice group of people in Lilongwe and although it is quite a small city it is large enough to have a number of different groups of friends. Although it would be entirely possible to socialise exclusively with expats, we enjoy meeting Malawians and have found them to be a very friendly, lively and interesting bunch. As I said at the beginning of this email, it’s rare not to get a smile or a laugh from a Malawian.

Recently we spent a very relaxing and enjoyable weekend at the Lake. We stayed in a private cottage owned by a company who looks after most of our freight. The cottage backed right onto the beach so we were able to sit in the shade and chat or read, swim and snooze. We also went snorkeling with some tropical fish. Having grown up by the coast, it was strange to swim in a natural body of water and not be all salty when you got out but it was still lovely to be able to swim.

So, having been here 4 months I’m definitely settling in. It’s a very interesting time to be here and despite (even because of?) the challenges I’m glad to be here at this particular time. It feels to me like there are enough people who are not satisfied with the way things are here to get together and pray and act for change. Although we may not see that change during our time here, it’s good to think that we are capable of making a difference.